It struck me a few days ago...how imperceptible the passing of time can be. Even though some days can feel so long, when you look back over a season or a year, it is difficult to understand how time has passed in you are in the same, exact spot. It is overwhelming, especially when things haven't worked out the way you thought they would. It is disheartening. That's the word...disheartening. In that moment when it comes together for you, often due to a pivotal moment or moments all clumped together, it presents itself like a giant question mark.

But then when the panic subsides, it becomes clear that in truth you are not in the same exact place. Maybe in a worse place, but still--not the same. All of this made me think of growing grapes, as most things do. Everything for me is rehearsal for that. Learning lessons and laying groundwork. Surrounding myself with people I can count on who want to be a part of something alive who aren't afraid to live outside the box. That's more difficult to find than you think. But in the interest of trying to use everything as a learning experience, I thought of the most cyclical thing of all. The growing season. Year in and year out, the same months with the same seasonal shifts come and go. The struggles and choices made -- some that we can control and others that control us -- are sometimes viewed best in hindsight. I think about the repetition. Would that be boring? Probably not. In actuality repetition can be comforting. It can provide the framework within which we can anticipate and is a foundation for growth. How would I feel about a bad cycle -- a bad vintage-- and how would I view the mistakes I had made. How would I reconcile the final product compared to how I thought it would be? It made me have renewed respect for the growers of wine. It made me wonder how they feel at the end of a difficult vintage. How they manage bottling a wine that turned out less than they had hoped. And I wonder how long the lessons and the scars of that vintage stayed with them. Can they ever let it go?